LUKE 5:12-16
It happened that there was a man full of leprosy in one of the towns
where Jesus was; and when he saw Jesus, he fell prostrate, pleaded with
him, and said, "Lord, if you wish, you can make me clean." Jesus
stretched out his hand, touched him, and said, "I do will it. Be made
clean." And the leprosy left him immediately. Then he ordered him not to
tell anyone, but "Go, show yourself to the priest and offer for your
cleansing what Moses prescribed; that will be proof for them." The
report about him spread all the more, and great crowds assembled to
listen to him and to be cured of their ailments, but he would withdraw
to deserted places to pray.
We would do well to emulate the leper's attitude and his simple prayer today. "Lord, if you wish, you can make me clean." Jesus has the power to clean us of all doubt, fear, anxiety, disappointment, depression and pain. All we have to do is ask Him to do so in faith and humility. The gospel says that the leper fell prostrate and pleaded with Jesus. I wonder how the leper felt when Jesus responded "I do will it. Be made clean." It was probably the happiest day of his life!
I still forget that we have already been saved by Jesus from darkness, for many times I still allow fear and pain to rule my life. During my prayer time this morning the Lord reminded me that His will for me as His daughter is a life of abundant joy, not endless suffering. I had
been walking around again limping, sometimes bleeding, thinking that I have to make my life a sacrifice in order to deserve my place in God's Kingdom one day. In hiding behind my pain, however, I have not allowed Jesus to heal me. I had stopped placing my hope in Him, forgetting His love for me. A different kind of leprosy had taken over me and I forgot to ask the One who could so easily clean me and who has been waiting all along to help me!
My version of the Bible quoted above speaks of "cleaning" and not "healing" for the leper. I looked up the meaning of "clean" and Mr. Webster says: 1 a : to make clean: as (1) : to rid of dirt, impurities, or extraneous matter (2) : to rid of corruption. I know I have allowed
impurities like worldly standards to pollute my mind and heart. Lord Jesus, if you wish, you can make me clean. I have been bogged down by "extraneous matters", things that have significance in the world but are utterly useless for someone who wishes to become the Lord's servant.
Lord Jesus, if you wish, you can make me clean. The last meaning of the verb "Clean" is " to rid of corruption". That is part of my job in Sandiganbayan, but I cannot do it alone! Lord Jesus, if you wish, you can make our country clean.
For today I will strive to ask my Lord to make me clean, for I know that just like He did to the leper, He shall remove all dirt and impurities from my life and make me clean!
For this year the Lord's message for me consists of one word: "Yield" - which the dictionary says means "to give up possession of on claim or demand". It is not an easy command but this week too I was reminded by the 1st letter of John chapter Four that the Lord's commandments are not burdensome. I am devoting this year to learning the meaning of "Yield" in my life. Today, however, I know that one of the parts of my yielding to Christ is by asking Him in prayer to make me clean.
Friday, January 09, 2004
Monday, December 15, 2003
Saturday, November 01, 2003
The Waters of Power
My blood sister's baptismal name is Ma. Cristina so I've always been curious what the famous Ma. Cristina Falls looks like. Ate is now an Australian citizen and on the day of the Lingkod National Leaders Training Conference (NLTC) outing in Iligan, I proudly texted her that I was on my way to finally see her namesake. I almost did not join the outing because of body aches brought about by the E-Night and all the preparations that went to it, but something in me could not forego that rare chance of seeing the waterfalls of Iligan City.
I got a tangerine sticker so I belonged to Bus No. 1, Jeeps No. 1-7, and Ma. Cristina was the last place our group visited. I was excited, momentarily forgetting all physical discomfort caused by the 350 steps (one-way) we climbed and the rain that soaked us the whole day.
Ma. Cristina was worth the wait. Living water seemed to gush out of the mountains. For me, it was a magnificent display of God's power. I was content just to stare at it and to marvel at how such a beautiful thing could be so powerful. God's word for me during the first day of the NLTC came back, which was to Soak in His power, so that when I am squeezed by my personal challenges back in the real world, it would be His glory that would come out of me. I stood there before the Ma. Cristina falls soaking in the beauty around me, and soaking in the nonstop rain as well. Despite the hustle and bustle of activity around me -- picture-taking ad infinitum with brothers and sisters; lectures from brother-biologists and environmentalists - in my heart I was saying a prayer of thanksgiving to the God who created Ma. Cristina falls.
I was content, relatively, until a sister from Lingkod-Iligan announced over the megaphone, "Brothers and sisters, in five minutes, they will turn the power of the waterfalls full blast". I tuned in to the lecturers beside me to inquire what "full blast" meant, for I was already overwhelmed by the manifestation of God's excellence before me. I was told to watch out for a greater burst of water and a higher level of splash. Having left all scientific thinking back in high school, I pestered my brothers, "But how would I know if it's already full blast???" The professionals looked at me in half-wonder and half-exasperation and said, "Ella, you'll just know. Stay put and just watch out for it." I heard a whisper in my heart, "Be still and know
that I am God."
A few minutes passed and then I knew that the water was falling full blast. What a blessing it was, for I didn't expect it. I saw again how only God could outdo Himself in splendor.
On the way back to Chali Beach, I could not sleep. As our bus wound its way around the various checkpoints on the road, I reflected on the message of the full-blast waterfalls for me. I particularly felt an awareness of how I often underestimated this God I had committed my life
to. Thinking I had already used up my apportionment of grace after God showed His power over my profession, family, service, actually, in most areas of my life, I thought that where life had led me was "it" already. I thought it was up to me to sustain my serving of grace until my last
days on earth, but there in between Iligan and Cagayan de Oro, God actually reminded me that He was faithful to finish whatever work He began in me. I felt Him telling me, "You ain't seen nothing yet, My child. I haven't gone full blast yet."
Just as I didn't deserve to be saved by Him from all the pitfalls I fell into in the past, I believed that I had done nothing to deserve this fresh outpouring of grace that was before me. Beset by personal turmoil now that I am back in my little world in QC, I am reminded of God's display of majesty and I know just what to do - to stay put and to watch Him work His wonders once again.
Psalm 63: 2-9 (NAB)
O God, you are my God-- for you I long!
For you my body yearns; for you my soul thirsts,
Like a land parched, lifeless, and without water.
So I look to you in the sanctuary to see your power and glory.
For your love is better than life; my lips offer you worship!
I will bless you as long as I live; I will lift up my hands, calling on
your name.
My soul shall savor the rich banquet of praise, with joyous lips my
mouth shall honor you!
When I think of you upon my bed, through the night watches I will recall
That you indeed are my help, and in the shadow of your wings I shout for
joy.
My soul clings fast to you; your right hand upholds me.
I got a tangerine sticker so I belonged to Bus No. 1, Jeeps No. 1-7, and Ma. Cristina was the last place our group visited. I was excited, momentarily forgetting all physical discomfort caused by the 350 steps (one-way) we climbed and the rain that soaked us the whole day.
Ma. Cristina was worth the wait. Living water seemed to gush out of the mountains. For me, it was a magnificent display of God's power. I was content just to stare at it and to marvel at how such a beautiful thing could be so powerful. God's word for me during the first day of the NLTC came back, which was to Soak in His power, so that when I am squeezed by my personal challenges back in the real world, it would be His glory that would come out of me. I stood there before the Ma. Cristina falls soaking in the beauty around me, and soaking in the nonstop rain as well. Despite the hustle and bustle of activity around me -- picture-taking ad infinitum with brothers and sisters; lectures from brother-biologists and environmentalists - in my heart I was saying a prayer of thanksgiving to the God who created Ma. Cristina falls.
I was content, relatively, until a sister from Lingkod-Iligan announced over the megaphone, "Brothers and sisters, in five minutes, they will turn the power of the waterfalls full blast". I tuned in to the lecturers beside me to inquire what "full blast" meant, for I was already overwhelmed by the manifestation of God's excellence before me. I was told to watch out for a greater burst of water and a higher level of splash. Having left all scientific thinking back in high school, I pestered my brothers, "But how would I know if it's already full blast???" The professionals looked at me in half-wonder and half-exasperation and said, "Ella, you'll just know. Stay put and just watch out for it." I heard a whisper in my heart, "Be still and know
that I am God."
A few minutes passed and then I knew that the water was falling full blast. What a blessing it was, for I didn't expect it. I saw again how only God could outdo Himself in splendor.
On the way back to Chali Beach, I could not sleep. As our bus wound its way around the various checkpoints on the road, I reflected on the message of the full-blast waterfalls for me. I particularly felt an awareness of how I often underestimated this God I had committed my life
to. Thinking I had already used up my apportionment of grace after God showed His power over my profession, family, service, actually, in most areas of my life, I thought that where life had led me was "it" already. I thought it was up to me to sustain my serving of grace until my last
days on earth, but there in between Iligan and Cagayan de Oro, God actually reminded me that He was faithful to finish whatever work He began in me. I felt Him telling me, "You ain't seen nothing yet, My child. I haven't gone full blast yet."
Just as I didn't deserve to be saved by Him from all the pitfalls I fell into in the past, I believed that I had done nothing to deserve this fresh outpouring of grace that was before me. Beset by personal turmoil now that I am back in my little world in QC, I am reminded of God's display of majesty and I know just what to do - to stay put and to watch Him work His wonders once again.
Psalm 63: 2-9 (NAB)
O God, you are my God-- for you I long!
For you my body yearns; for you my soul thirsts,
Like a land parched, lifeless, and without water.
So I look to you in the sanctuary to see your power and glory.
For your love is better than life; my lips offer you worship!
I will bless you as long as I live; I will lift up my hands, calling on
your name.
My soul shall savor the rich banquet of praise, with joyous lips my
mouth shall honor you!
When I think of you upon my bed, through the night watches I will recall
That you indeed are my help, and in the shadow of your wings I shout for
joy.
My soul clings fast to you; your right hand upholds me.
Friday, October 31, 2003
Friday, October 24, 2003
Tuesday, October 21, 2003
Friday, September 12, 2003
Childlike Faith
Sitting on my office desk is a gift from my friend Tess. She cut out one of the pencil sketches made by a New York artist of Jesus playing with a baby, and placed it inside a beautiful frame to remind me of how Jesus sees me and how I can be with Him. I alwalys stare at the picture when the walls close in on me in the office, for it shows me how I can run to Jesus like a child and be a delight to Him.
I met up with a law school friend a couple of weeks ago. Though she is older than me and a product of Catholic education, she told me that she only discovered the rosary this year and has been praying it regularly. She says that she does not understand the mysteries but she clings to them, memorizing them like a child, and this has given her so much peace in her advancing single life. Come to think of it, because I've wanted to understand it and analyze it, I haven't memorized the new Mysteries of the Light yet.
The e-mail I forwarded yesterday from Max Lucado paints another picture of the Father wanting to play with His children. How long has it been since I had allowed God to be God? This morning during my prayer time I was all apologies to God, for even my time with Him is disturbed by text messages and wandering thoughts about the things I have to do. I felt His hands on both my cheeks this morning and heard Him telling me, "My daughter, before
you run off again attempting to please me, I want you to know that what would truly delight me is if you could BE STILL for a few minutes before me."
"Be still and know that I am God", the Lord told the Psalmist. I am re-learning this lesson, that no matter how good the things I busy myself with are, if I cannot stop long enough to abide in the Lord in complete abandon, then I am spending my time on what's merely second best.
1 Corinthians 13:1-3
"If I speak in human and angelic tongues but do not have love, I am a
resounding gong or a clashing cymbal. And if I have the gift of prophecy
and comprehend all mysteries and all knowledge; if I have all faith so as
to move mountains but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give away
everything I own, and if I hand my body over so that I may boast but do
not have love, I gain nothing."
I went to Mass today with a desire to spend quality time with the only King of my Heart, the Lover of my Soul, my tower of refuge and strength. I felt His unconditional love despite my faults, weaknesses, imperfections, mistakes. If He were one to count these, He would have
given up on me a long time ago. More than ever, I want to go back to the beginning of my love story with God, when I trusted Him more and relied less on my own judgment and strength. The writer Elisabeth Elliott, already a grandmother, said that she finds delight in being a child before God.
I hope to learn to believe with childlike faith and to surrender everything to the Lord more fully now. Maybe that is the secret to a joyful, peaceful heart. :)
I met up with a law school friend a couple of weeks ago. Though she is older than me and a product of Catholic education, she told me that she only discovered the rosary this year and has been praying it regularly. She says that she does not understand the mysteries but she clings to them, memorizing them like a child, and this has given her so much peace in her advancing single life. Come to think of it, because I've wanted to understand it and analyze it, I haven't memorized the new Mysteries of the Light yet.
The e-mail I forwarded yesterday from Max Lucado paints another picture of the Father wanting to play with His children. How long has it been since I had allowed God to be God? This morning during my prayer time I was all apologies to God, for even my time with Him is disturbed by text messages and wandering thoughts about the things I have to do. I felt His hands on both my cheeks this morning and heard Him telling me, "My daughter, before
you run off again attempting to please me, I want you to know that what would truly delight me is if you could BE STILL for a few minutes before me."
"Be still and know that I am God", the Lord told the Psalmist. I am re-learning this lesson, that no matter how good the things I busy myself with are, if I cannot stop long enough to abide in the Lord in complete abandon, then I am spending my time on what's merely second best.
1 Corinthians 13:1-3
"If I speak in human and angelic tongues but do not have love, I am a
resounding gong or a clashing cymbal. And if I have the gift of prophecy
and comprehend all mysteries and all knowledge; if I have all faith so as
to move mountains but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give away
everything I own, and if I hand my body over so that I may boast but do
not have love, I gain nothing."
I went to Mass today with a desire to spend quality time with the only King of my Heart, the Lover of my Soul, my tower of refuge and strength. I felt His unconditional love despite my faults, weaknesses, imperfections, mistakes. If He were one to count these, He would have
given up on me a long time ago. More than ever, I want to go back to the beginning of my love story with God, when I trusted Him more and relied less on my own judgment and strength. The writer Elisabeth Elliott, already a grandmother, said that she finds delight in being a child before God.
I hope to learn to believe with childlike faith and to surrender everything to the Lord more fully now. Maybe that is the secret to a joyful, peaceful heart. :)
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