Workout for the Heart

Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy. (Proverbs 27:5-6)

A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.  (Proverbs 18:24) 

Waves and Cliffs (Great Ocean Road)

I came across a quote today that brought on a search for what the Proverbs said about friendship. This is the quote:

The most memorable people in life will be the friends who loved you when you weren't very lovable.

This spoke to me because I was not a very good friend during my gap year. Aside from being far away from my friends, I was too moody, sensitive, and emotional. They would probably argue that I had always been all those, but distance and the luxury of time allowed me to embrace those parts of me more, and to accept them.

I didn't even try to be lovable. I express my love language through service, quality time, and giving gifts. How could I exercise those three by being in another country?

I was selfish the past year. All I thought about was how to improve myself, how to face my demons, how to break my barriers, and how to reach my dreams. Of course I had the noble purpose of getting healed so I could be a better person and friend. But still, I must have been a pain to listen to, or read.

I must be getting on in years, too. I am ready to say that I do not need a whole village anymore, just a few friends.

My heart was pierced recently, and I thought it would break completely. My SD reminded me that my heart is a muscle, and it needed the exercise to be stronger. Well if pain was the workout for my heart, then I had a lot of opportunities to strengthen it.  

And the true friends are the ones who loved me when I wasn't very lovable, and who did not hide their love even if it meant staying through my storms and saying the painful words.

As for the rest, I will try to let go without regret. Maybe as the wounds heal, so shall the memories, and I will hold no grudges, only gratitude.