Shackled

I didn't mean to get to this place.
I was going somewhere else -
Somewhere far away, and distant, and different.
But a familiar song made me look back.

And I fell again into the hole I'd just gotten myself out of.
The hole is dark, and musty, and I hate it.
I hate it.
I can't blame anyone this time, for I walked right into it.
I wasn't prepared for the light, maybe.

I wanted the light, but was accustomed to darkness.
I wanted to change, but was stuck with my patterns.
I wanted to move on, but was scared to stand.

I am sorry to The One who rescued me before.
Many times before.
I am down here.
I have not learned anything after all.

Don't lower any ropes.  
Don't call the rescue team.
They are not enough for the willingly chained.