Monday, January 17, 2005

Signs of Aging

Many things are beginning to show.

I get tired easily. Whereas before I could dance for hours and still smile at my crush, now I have to catch my breath in the middle of a dance number and scramble to the nearest water dispenser for a drink afterwards!

I need eight hours of sleep. I was known in earlier years as the overnight queen. I could survive on little sleep and still make it to school or the office - and have a productive day at that. Now I have to go home early even if I'm out with friends at night because I have to consider my energy level for the next working day. Older people used to do that and I used to think they were corny and party poopers.

When I think about it, however, I much prefer my life now to the life of a partying law student or a cheating high school (MaScian) crammer. With age came financial independence. I have more confidence in my abilities and talents now. I've fulfilled some dreams and survived many pains. The list is long. Life has grown richer throughout the years.

I thought about aging today because I was faced with many challenging situations. Instead of giving in to my emotions, I remembered to do the proper thing each time. I have learned to be polite even through my pain. This is a breakthrough, for I used to be very transparent with my emotions.

Now I'm only a little transparent. Instead of revealing my unwarranted emotions to the people concerned, I was able to control them.

At this point I still need an outlet, though, and I thank God I have a blog. The world could know that I was sad, hurt, disappointed, rejected, humiliated, and embarrased by different people at different times in just one day.

But the people involved would never know. Ah, the beauty of old age and modern technology. You get to learn new tricks.

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